Episode 5: HEALING ME. 🌟רפא ✨ KARDAYAH'S Soul's Motivational Shine

Summary

We all seek help healing. Life’s curves and shake ups can so easily leave you dirty and scarred.

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I am sorry that I have hurt you. I regret even making you cry. If I’ve slandered your name; or taken your place. If I have told you a lie. If you feel that I have beat you up or stepped on your toes. You should know that my intentions were pure.

If I’ve ever shown you jealousy. If I’ve exhibited too much pride. I sincerely apologize.

If i was a nuisance in anyway; just know I’ve come in peace. Not bearing gifts. What a shame. I know. I truly am sorry.

If I didn’t spend enough time. If I have pulled away just when you needed me. If I ate it all and saved you none. If I made the better choice for me. I’m sorry.

I just know that when I say, I love you. Yes, I really do. I pray that your pain will be fair. Taking the backseat to the growth that I seek.

You see? I may not stick to your plan. I may step outside of the lines. Guess what! I’m working on me now. Of this you should be proud.

I just need you to know that I’m in love with this chick. She makes me glow when she comes around. So it’s hard to focus on you. No offense.

Please don’t feel down. She is just simply fascinating! I know how bad it sounds my friend. She has an immense hold on me. Try to understand please.

This lady she makes me want to kick bad habits. She said that with my spirit; I should spend more time. She instills a certain peace in me. She really makes me smile.

I don’t mean to be so distant; trust I do miss you. And I’m sorry.

Yesterday, I was standing in the sun light; it lit up the clearest sky. I’m drawing wisdom from the cosmos. I’m planning an escape. Trying to master my craft. I’m learning how and when I should put my magic to use.

I am busy realizing that I could love almost anyone. I am accepting the fact that all love is not true. I’m learning what love is and how it resembles insanity. Iam learning to be true.

What you get out of it lies with you. I know it’s a long and fascinating journey. I’ve learned that sometimes parts of it have to be let go.

I know now that not everyone can handle. The storm that is Me. Not everyone will understand my words. Most times when they’re looking at my storm. They most likely don’t see Me.

Not everyone will break your heart and not everyone deserves the chance to. Not everyone will believe in my dreams. Not everyone breathes romance the way that we do. But I do and I’m sorry.

I’m sorry if leaving to find me has become a hindrance to you. Sorry to stand here with the audacity to put me before you.

Please fear not. For a time will come when I will arrive at the place that I long to be. I will feel complete within myself. There will be a difference that the world will see. You will see.

I will come back home and I will play my role. I will be the best friend that you ever did know. I’ll shower you with truth. I will walk you to the door.

Yet, you should know; my lovely loves. One thing will remain true. There is no way in this crumbling world! That I’m gonna lose She trying to stand by you. I am sorry.

©2016 Coretta Brewton

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I thought that I was in for a life long fight to rid myself of you. Not only from my shattered life, but to wash you from my soul. My conscience can no longer stand your space. Umm.. that was deep.

I almost lost my life to you. Your way pointed me to death. I was being whipped while soothing you. My spirit continuously wept.

I was a 1000 miles ahead of you. You we’re only in my way. Hmmph…
And I let you shake me. You played a playa. You humiliated me in every way. Poor little me.

Sadly, I loved you. Like really loved you. I’ve realized it recently. I know that you knew these things too. I smelled the deceit that you wore with pride.

You’ve casted an immense shade over me. You put out my light. You applied pressure to my pressure points. You controlled my life. My oh my, The sly ONES I do like.

But all that was fading away. All of the games that you’ve played. All of the grieving that you’ve put me through. It is slowly fading away. The heavy loads of confusion. The outlandish things that I’ve been accustomed to.

Whilst honoring you as my king. I set myself up for doom. Mrs. Coretta, yes me. You played me like a pro. The battleship that we were on; almost sank with my soul.

Just to think that I would have chosen you and completely lost myself. I would have fought the waves forever. Just to live my life with you. I would have given it all away just to be with you. I would have loved you endlessly. If only you were true.

But Yah. But Yah wouldn’t let you stop me. This force to be reckoned with.

Yah continuously knocked me around while you we’re knocking Me down. Then he picked me up and pointed my feet. He stood beside me he continued to guide me. He showed me that he loved me.

And guess what Yah didn’t lie. He stepped in to draw a line. He popped open my ears and opened my EYE. Each day I grow stronger and more satisfied. He’s never lied.

So to you I write this letter. I hope it reaches you in time. Because my heart belongs to another. Oh, how he makes me smile. He promised that he’ll hold my heart. To him I will be true. He told me that he would cherish me. He’s just better than you.

Sincerely.

Coretta Brewton ©2016